In love

Absolutely enjoying myself in the new job, that I am doing covering someone else's maternity.
Love it.
Why?
- because it is about categories and brands that I've known and worked with for years, and grew to love;
- because there is a lot to learn, lots of interesting stuff;
- because the situation is appealing to me: we are suffering a bit, market going down, loosing share and people are not expecting a lot... I am the guy who can come from behind and unexpectedly deliver great stuff (the underdog! I love being in this position);
- because the guy who is my boss has a great depth of knowledge and is taking a very didactic approach, taking opportunities to teach his team;
- because also it is a good situation, not a lot is expected from me (just covering a maternity) so the pressure is relatively low;
- because there is a very visibile lack of knowledge in the rest of the company in this category... I am really a goldmine with the depth and wealth of insights and learning I have from having worked (through different jobs, functions and regionalities) with these categories and brands
- because I have colleagues! It's a team of 5 of us, reporting to 1 guy. We are all around the same age and experiencing the same things! Being in the senior team, I am also quite respected by the younger managers which is something I also appreciate... And also the young managers are cool, intelligent and nice (also to look at!:) )

And... I am loving it so much that I am finding huge ammounts of energy, I am amazingly much more positive and... contaminating everybody around me with this energy! I am also a lot more confortable taking and making decisions and... coming up with a lot more cool ideas.
It's amazing the difference it makes when you actually are enjoying a lot what you are doing. When you are passionate about it.

How to live in purpose?

I'm feeling quite low...
Unmotivated is the key word.
What the hell am I doing with my life? What the hell do I want to do with my life?

I know that I have a full life in front of me. I do know that I can do whatever I want to do. I am extremely lucky in that I have always had food & shelter and all the chances to have an education. I have always landed good jobs. I have a strong supportive family. I have all the conditions to be happy.

But I just don't seem to be doing something that is motivating. Work is paramount to me. I want to be fulfiled my work.
But I don't know what is it that would fulfil me and give me daily joy.

How do you understand this? How can I discover what I would really want to do?
Can somebody help me?

Perspective again

Hey!
Been out for a few days with some stomach problems. Really annoying as they kept me in bed for the entire weekend and made me miss a good friends wedding and a very big match, the final of the cup.
Being in bed the pain was annoying, I couldn't sit up or do anything just lie down and also had trouble falling asleep. There was also quite a bit of fever!
In all this, something was really strange. I was thinking that this could be something serious and bad... and at some stage I almost wished that it was so that I could stop my job and really think about my priorities and allign my life with them. It was definitely very clear that I wanted to stop what I am doing and do something else.
It's key to decide what I want to do (and agree with it deep down) and then go on and do it.
I realised that I was happy in my times abroad. Even though they were difficult, I was driven by an inner sense and strength? I wanted to do it and I was living life?
I felt good, I felt I was experiencing things, I was becoming more experienced and at the same time I became much more myself: as I saw different ways of working and above all different attitudes to life, I was much more able to see what I was doing, what was due to my personality and what was due to social conditioning.

Hey ho

Hey!
Lot has happened in the last few days.
Went out to a wedding abroad of a very good friend of mt girlfriend. It was... demanding.
I had to travel quite a bit by myself to get there and then argued quite a bit with the girlfriend. Still need to figure out what happened and how I feel about it. It was tough though, specially with not a lot of sleeping.
What I do know is that I felt really undervalued and generated quite a bit of insecurity.
We were close to splitting up and - this made me realise how my life is empty?! She is quite important to me, if we would split up, I would struggle.
Action:
- balance my life, I am definitely over-investing in work! Need other things, friends, sport, that I will value get more balance into my life!
- Work on purpose! What do I really want out of life. I have been thinking about this for such a long time - it really is time to start doing things about it, taking ACTION! Someone said there are a few characteristics of successful people: a VISION and TAKING ACTION are definitely among them.
- discuss and define next step with my girlfriend: we are living in different countries, it is probably about time we have a clear plan on what to do, next steps, etc
- above all, bear in mind: Whatever life throws at me, I will handle it!

Then got back and spent loads of time preparing a strategy review to the board, again working really late, not getting enough sleep...

Old job: likes and dislikes?

This exercise can help me in deepening my understanding of what I want to do, what is my passion.

What did I like in the job that I am about to leave? What did I enjoy? What will I miss?
- contact with people from all over the world. Talk to them, understand how they live, their ambitions and dreams. How they work.
- travelling, being in different countries, visiting different cities, seeing different lifestyles
- the people. Overall relaxed, nice and driven. Good professionals, efficient. I could learn from them
- status: I was very respected and somewhat feared. People wanted to please me. Though I do think this comes not only from the job but also from my personal characteristics (I am a good presenter and have good presence in meetings, Also having been there for a few years and having multiple country and category experiences makes me quite confident and at ease in some discussions)
- time and independence: I was managing my own agenda and could do what I wanted to
- other people: if they were good (eg tech people, mkt research...) they would get on with their work, I would only have to ensure that they were doing what was needed
- the resources: being on global projects money was never an issue, whatever kind of research needed doing... it would be done!

What didn't I like?
- not knowing how to progress some projects, what is the next action?
- lobby: one of the tech centers was mainly composed of people from 1 nationality, often I would be the odd one out. As I don't speak that language, they wouldn´t mind and chat away. Also, this country was becoming leader and gaining full power in Europe...
- tired?! I've been in this business for years!! I've seen it and was not in any way passionate about it anymore. It wasn´t firing me up anymore. And I don't want that.
- Feel old on the job. I was there for donkeys years, people were coming and going and I was there.
- Future perspectives: I was in the best role, in order to be promoted into a director role in a couple of years. Now... even it sounds attractive, that does not motivate me. Seeing myself as a director in a European country doesn't really appeal to me.
- Career: for years and years there have been rumours that my company could potentially divest from the area where I work. Also, it is a quite specific market and business. Let's say I would be out of a job in a couple of years. My perspectives could be quite grim as my experience was narrow. So I really need to broaden my experience!!!